Freedom Fighters

Author: Kristen Kirk

With the Fourth of July just having passed, I'm thinking about freedom and how I don't give my kids much of it. They're going into third and fifth grade, but in my mind they're barely 3 years old. Sure, they walk and talk just fine. They just shouldn't walk and talk at the same time without me being a few feet away. If they fall because they didn't see a big boulder in their way as they were too preoccupied reciting the Declaration of Independence (yeah, I think my kids are pretty smart), and I'm not there to catch them, I'm a bad momma and Social Services is coming to get me. As long as I'm vigilant every hour of their waking hours, they will be safe, right? I've been trying to figure out why I am Protective Parent (without shelling out any bucks to a psychologist; I'd rather use the money to buy my kids new bike helmets and skateboard knee pads.) My parents weren't particularly protective, just like most parents of their generation. I didn't wear a bike helmet. I skateboarded down hills and smashed up my ankle when I slammed into the curb on several occasions. I walked seven blocks alone to school - when I was in kindergarten. I played outside every day during the summer. My mom knew I was somewhere in the neighborhood, and that I would come home for lunch and dinner, and sometimes to stand in front of our air conditioning unit to cool down. When we would venture to the local swimming pool, my brother and I would jump in and my mom would sit about a quarter mile away in her lawn chair and read. The pool seemed to have one lifeguard for every 100 swimmers - and we were all OK. I've only recently allowed my kids to play outside without my eagle eye supervising. They can go right in front of the house, in our cul de sac, with helmets on, and they have strict orders to watch for one of the three cars that might turn onto our road. Before, I would sit by the window in the front of the house and watch their every move. Now, I sit by that same window and try to work on my computer as they play. I type a sentence, look out the window, locate both children, count four limbs each, scan for blood, and then type another sentence. (Dear Editor, can you see this is why I'm often late submitting my articles?) My protectiveness has worked. Never when I've had my eyes on my children have they gotten hurt. When my son broke his leg, he was at daycare. When my daughter fell and needed stitches in her chin, she was at her dance class. I am a lucky charm with magic powers to ward off injury. Or am I kidding myself? I'm not sure, and I'm trying to be a brave soldier and find out. Well, let me rephrase that: My husband, the General, is pushing my fear factor by encouraging our children to do unthinkable things without me watching. Granted he's nearby, if not actually participating in the craziness, but still, he's taking big risks: He convinced my son, who seems to share my fear of heights, to go on the Tornado at Great Wolf Lodge. If you go there and are thinking about going on the ride, don't look outside the far left window. That is where you can actually see what happens when you go on that water ride. All I'm going to say is "90-degree angle." Big Crazy Man and Budding Crazy Boy didn't tell me about their plans. They waited to tell me afterward, as I was soaking in the resort's huge hot tub (the only drop there is into a seat by the powerful water jet). My son's smile stretched ear to ear. By the end of the next day, he and his sister and a friend (to whom they lied, telling her the drop was merely a slight incline) had ridden the Tornado 15 times. I kept waiting for the lifeguard to rush toward me to tell me the ambulance was on its way, but the day ended with everyone intact. Now, they have memories of butterflies in their tummies, laughter and shared splashes in water - and while I still have my fear, I might be just a little closer to signing my kids' declaration of independence. Let's hope a war isn't necessary for me to take pen to paper. Kristen De Deyn Kirk is a longtime Tidewater Parent contributor and editor of www.mytidewatermoms.com.

Source: Tidewater Parent Magazine