How much do you volunteer?
Has anyone studied how much the average parent volunteers? I'm thinking mainly about the things we do for our kids -- troop leaders, coaching, helping in the classroom. I would imagine it depends on a person's income and available time. I'm burnt out but feel guilty about it because I have a sneaking suspicion (and I'm too tired to check if that word is spelled right!) that I fall on the low end of volunteering. I know every parent needs to do what is right for her/him, but I can't get over this internal tug of war going on in my head: Just do what you want. No, do more, you're a damn slacker. Do what you want; no, do more...
So, on average, how many hours a month do you volunteer?
here and there
Now that I'm not working in an office all day, I'm thrilled to be able to chaparone field trips, help on special days at school where extra hands are needed for projects, try to go to lunch with my 2nd grader (I'm banned by my daughter from middle school lunch, guess I'm not cool enough), sell dance tickets at the middle school, sell pizza at the middle school dances, be a guest reader at the preschool on library days, etc. But at the moment it's on a one-time basis and not on a regular basis with a PTA position, etc. I've been a troop leader and a PTA board member and you're right, they do take up a lot of time that's not directly involved with my kids, but somebody's got to do it and I appreciate those willing to take that on right now when I'm not.
I also try to volunteer with my kids - at church or with military families, delivering meals to the housebound or sick, etc. so they can learn the value of donating their time and compassion as well.
Michelle Galvez, Community Editor
Grateful
Yes, I meant to say in my post that I am VERY grateful to the parents who do take on the leadership positions... I know they are important to all the kids.
Alison Johnson
Volunteer activities
I'm not sure how many hours I volunteer, but my focus is to pick activities where I will have direct contact with my kids at the same time. That means going on field trips, helping with class parties, reading to the class, volunteering for trash cleanup events or fundraising walks my kids can do too, signing up for extra snack days for team sports, etc. This year at school I signed up to help put together "SOL survival kits," which involves creating little bags with pencils, erasers and pencil sharpeners. I can do that at home so it doesn't take me away from my family. I don't get into the "authority" positions such as PTA president or club leader because I feel like those take too much time away from my kids (plus I truly hate meetings and am not sure I play so well with others). Between my writing work and the kids being at school much of the day, I want to use the volunteer time I have to get more time with my boys... kill two birds with one stone, if you will. That might make me selfish, but that's what has worked best for me so far.
Alison Johnson
Voluteering
You summed it up for me Alison. I did a leadership role with PTA and the amount of time it took from my family was overwhelming. I wondered what good I was doing for my children by being on the phone, attending meetings and answering emails. The emails were sucking up a lot of time. I guess because most of the folks doing it are not doing a paid job. Like you, I work a paid position, have kids plus help with an aging mother with dementia (her physical therapists know me well). So my volunteer time is with my daughters in sight of me and me of them. The summer swim team is just on meeting a month with a couple of months off, plus those involved have paid positions, so things are short and to the point. The swim meets are easy to volunteer because we are going to be there anyways to watch our daughters swim (and hopefully win). However, with church, swim team and school I have on more than one occaision had to take advice from the DARE organizaiton - just say no.
Susan Smigielski Acker
We're all volunteers...
On one level or another, parents are all volunteers. Even if the pregnancy was unplanned we still "volunteer" to raise a child. Even if we adopt a child, we're volunteering there, too. We volunteer ourselves for 18-plus years of little sleep and big stress to one day send our child out into the world and, perhaps, have their own kids.
So it shouldn't surprise us that parents - those who can spare the time - make up the bulk of volunteers for kid oriented stuff (we're also the ones who usually have the most interest in the activities our kids get involved in so this makes sense). We all want to do more as parents, but I think we end up doing as much as we can. From the moment we get up in the morning we "volunteer." Don't don't feel bad if you aren't the president of the PTA, don't coach all of your kid's sports teams or didn't find time to have lunch with your second grader at school last week. Parenting is all about doing the best we can and most parents do just that. But nobody ever gives them certificate for "volunteering" at the end of the year. That's too bad.
Volunteering
I am a worker bee. Meaning, if a event at my children's school needs someone to man a table for an hour or so, I am there. I am not an organizer. I love helping with the holiday crafts in the classroom as well. I agree it depends on time and money. I need to work (and I am blessed to make my own hours), so time is money to me. With the summer swim team, it is different because we have a small team. I have a lot of experience with swim competition from my teen and college years. I really enjoy it. So hour wise -it is about an hour a week during the school year, but the summer is more like five-eight hours.
Susan Smigielski Acker